161011 ❤

Hey.
11.18 good results and stay happy always? Well, life wasn't that smooth this days. I became alone. And I felt lonely. She left me she ditched me. I went to others. She got people's attention and sympathy. They stand up for her. They help her they befriend her. What about me? I'm all alone. Even the friends I be with are looking down on me they ignore me. Often neglected too but can't blame them. So this morning, went down to assembly with Tasha. She sat in front as she's the monitor. So I sat alone. Celine sat behind me and asked me she don't want you already? She go find others? I was speechless. What am I going to say. I kept asking myself. Then Celine told me to join them. I smiled and mixed with them. Pretty nice and happy? Maybe.
Really before Celine came to ask me to join them, I felt extremely lonely. I was afraid. The feeling of emptiness. How am I to face people. I don't know. Then I thought, tasha was lonely before but she was strong enough. But now she's not alone, even if she don't have friends she still have her bf. which I don't have. LOL.
Stop all this torture. You people don't know how it feels to me. I held back my tears every time I feel lonely. I cry while bathing so my family wouldn't know. I promised Peiqin not to be sad. Stay happy and be strong. I'm sorry but I didn't do it. I just ain't that strong. I thought I was but.. I ain't strong.
Recently, Myap and I went closer together..? And then Peiqin distant a little from us. Yes she have her friends. And what about me ? I have nothing.
Holidays nearing. Which means I wouldn't be in this class, this class with the same faces. Officially two years with them. Sweet and sour memories. I don't know if I would be sad when we all go to different classes. I tell people I wouldn't be sad. Because nothing's holding me back. I seems like I hardened my heart from feeling sad. I don't know. I'm just physically and mentally tired. Tired of being tired I would say.
Alright, ending this post with my SA2 results that I know:
Maths : A1 (79) I would have gotten 87 to 90 if not for my careless mistakes. Sucks. 😟
History : MCQ & Mapwork = 17/20
Source based essay = 12/30 SBQ nt yet known.
English: free writing: 19/30 Mdm low praised me in class LOL. LC = 19/30 editing: 4/10 sucks 😔 oral = 19/20 sigh all 19 !!